Fall is a season of change, the leaves change, the temperatures change, and even we change into creatures who want nothing more than to curl up and hibernate for a few months. Fall is also a time for waiting. We wait for the first snow...we wait for all our children to be under our roof again...and we wait for the old year to end and the new one to begin.
"The only thing constant in life is change." True in an ironic/idiotic sort of way and both of my girls will confirm that I am not a fan of change, especially when it comes to the two of them. As children they were always pushing forward as they reached out with both hands towards all of their "growing up" milestones. I on the other hand always seemed to be pulling backwards and our days were often spent in an awkward game of tug of war. Each new milestone was a turning point that took them one step farther away from me. I do not like change.
"Certain things,
they should stay the way they are.
You ought to be able to stick them in one of
those big glass cases and just leave them alone."
J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye
Recently I came across an email that one of my oldest and dearest friends from college forwarded to me when I started my blog. The following is part of a "catching
up" email that I sent to her in 2001, and it describes our life with
Scotty...and email that could have been written today...an email that even if written today would use the exact same words. I am profoundly struck by the fact that very little has changed since 2001...very little. Below is a small part of the original email.
 |
1988 |
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Lynnae
Date: Tue, May 1, 2012 at 2:28 PM
Subject: Scotty...memories
Jo, Okay...So...I never throw important things away and that includes emails from dear friends that maybe some day will remind me of my past which is necessary more and more these days. Take a look at the date, it was just yesterday. I think you need to buy a zoo. Miss you, Lynnae
October 7, 2001
Lynnae,
.......Scotty is like having a a 125 pound toddler, and all that goes with it...the tantrums, the stubbornness, and the exhausting, endless energy....add in the teenage hormones and look out baby....talk about the worst of both worlds.
October 7, 2001
Lynnae,
.......Scotty is like having a a 125 pound toddler, and all that goes with it...the tantrums, the stubbornness, and the exhausting, endless energy....add in the teenage hormones and look out baby....talk about the worst of both worlds.
However, hopefully this will pass, but right now
is really challenging, but we also get a snuggler, an endless supply of hugs and
kisses, someone who still wants to sit on our laps..someone who still needs us to "watch" him do everything and clap. He will always get excited about Santa and
Halloween and lots of other things that most kids grow out of.
And hopefully
he will keep us young.
He can't read or write or even draw a square for that matter. He still loves
Barney
and the Three Stooges and the Crocodile Hunter is his hero!
and the Three Stooges and the Crocodile Hunter is his hero!
Hopefully he will be able to hold some type of job. His passion
is animals. Our golden retriever is
getting ready to have puppies so he will be in dog heaven! Steve and I have even thought
of getting some property and opening a kennel and he could care for the animals.
Who knows. We really just want him to have a reason to get up in the morning after he is done with school...Love, Jo
Who knows. We really just want him to have a reason to get up in the morning after he is done with school...Love, Jo
Hmmm...There is something in every single sentence of this that makes me cry. Twelve years later we are still here...standing still...not moving...not changing...and waiting...and I can't seem to put my finger on what we are waiting for.
Perhaps it is our season to stand still.
Perhaps it is our season to wait.
Perhaps, for now, this is our purpose under heaven.
Our time for change will come,
In God's time.
Only then will it be our season to move forward.
Maybe Lynnae is right...Maybe we do need to buy a zoo.
 |
| May 2001 |
 |
| October 2012 |
You know, sometimes all you need is
twenty seconds of insane courage.
twenty seconds of insane courage.
Just literally twenty seconds
of just embarrassing bravery.
of just embarrassing bravery.
And I
promise you,
something great will come of it.
something great will come of it.
Benjamin Mee
We Bought A Zoo
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