Meet Our Mom

We’re taking over!!!! If you came for inspirational stories about Scotty.... today is not the day. In honor of Mother’s Day, Joanne’s other children, Stevi and Sarah (Hi!) have decided to take over her blog for one day to tell you about the amazing woman behind the blog who is not just a brilliant writer, but an amazing mom.

Who is Joanne?
Our mom. Duh.

Lessons we have learned from Jo Jo:
Be kind. Keep your panties on. Keep your door locked. Work hard. Make sure to double bolt your doors. Be humble. Carry pepper spray. You can get a tattoo…when you’re fifty.  “You know, never mind the double bolt on the door just get a metal bar to make the door impenetrable...don’t worry....I already bought you one for CHRISTMAS”.  Be ambitious. You can change your name inexplicably when you are fifty. What goes on the internet....stays on the internet. Forever.  “Forget the metal bar,  why not just NOT go outside in Chicago. Ever”. The smallest bit of cleavage is trashy, wear a parka.    Never sniff hand sanitizer...you will die....kids did...its on the news. You don’t stop acting like a child when you become an adult.  We are 20 and 23 and we still aren’t adults in the eyes of Jo Jo.
Never leave your drink alone at a party....even with your friends. They. Will. Rufi. You. Never get into a car with someone you don’t know, even if you’re friends with everyone else, don’t even think about doing it. “Surround yourself with a good set of girl friends and SEW BABY SEW”(shout out to the Sew Sistas)! Raw eggs, even those found in our grandmother’s recipes, are never okay. Hiding your shoes at the bottom of the stairs is not the same thing as taking them all the way to your room (and will therefore sometimes end up in the front yard). A monkey will never be allowed as a Baston pet, because they will throw their poop at you. Always remember that a text message when you get some place is welcome. Last but not least;  be best friends with your sister you’re lucky to have her and never forget where your home is. Lessons learned mom :) 

What Jo Jo has put up with:
We make fun of our mom a lot. A lot. We do it out of love naturally…and she is a pretty humorous lady from time to time. However,  we will take this time to admit that she had to put up with a lot raising the three of us.

From Stevi,

I was not an easy child to raise. I was grumpy, moody and ANGRY from the years 2000-2006. Thanks mom, for putting up with my sassy, sassy mouth that at times very blatantly performed witch craft against the family (not my proudest moment). Thanks mom, for allowing me to wear the glitter acid washed jeans that were three sizes too tight for a solid two years. I learned a valuable lesson about taste. Thanks mom, for supporting my many sports phases. I was not talented. I knew it. You knew it. But you still sat and watched EVERY single game and cheered for me EVERY time I purposely got hit by the softball and walked to first base.
Thanks mom for cleaning up roughly 4,000 cups from the couch, floor, my room, the bathroom, under the sink, Scotty’s room, top of the stairs and the back yard. Much appreciated. Thanks for wrapping my wrist, ankle, knee, neck and finger in various ace bandages that were not needed over the years. Thank you for supporting my hypochondria. Thanks mom for embodying Captain Hook, Peter Pan and other various roles that were required of you for 24 hours a day when I was 4 and a budding actress. Thanks mom for supporting my acting career and never making me feel like I should be pursuing a real job because you know I’m happiest when I’m acting. Most of all....thank you so much for putting up with me and not sending me to a psychiatric ward. I will try to show the same restraint with my future children.

From Sarah.

I would have been the easy child to raise had someone medicated me. I was hyper from the time I could walk, which unfortunately for Jo Jo was very early on and still continues today. I don’t think I ever stopped moving as a child. I was asked at least three times a day to run a lap around our downstairs to burn off energy. But I never remember getting in trouble for it, my mom embraced it. In middle school I wasn’t angry, I just pretended I was for performance sake! During that time I was also living with the reincarnated devil herself (Sorry Stevi, we all know it was true) so I picked up some sassy tips.
Middle school brought on the phases of Full Denim wearing Sarah and Hip Hop Sarah, and a horrible combination of the two. Looking back on pictures of my center part and mangled teeth, I questioned how anyone could let me walk out of the house looking like that, it’s because she is my mom. Thank you mom for letting me wear horrible outfits that went well with my unbrushed hair. Thank you for always making me feel special. Thank you for bringing me underwear the 500 times I peed my pants in elementary school. Thank you for not only being a mom to me but to a lot of my friends as well. Most of all.... thank you for putting notes in my lunch up until high school, because that is the kind of stuff I will never forget.

AND DON’T EVEN GET US STARTED ON SCOTTTTYY......

But seriously....
From Stevi,

I don’t say it enough but I feel like I hit the jack pot with getting to have Jo Jo as my mother. I’m not the most...how should we put this...loving person.  I’m not big on hugs and emotional conversations give me a stomach ache. I feel like someone somewhere was looking out for me when they gave me Joanne as a mom. Because of her, I saw first hand what love is;  her and my dad taught all of us each day what a loving marriage was. How many kids get to grow up watching that? Not many. Against crazy odds my parents are still together and against crazier odds still in love. Watching her unconditional love each day for Scotty and the rest of us fools taught me how to show love. Its because of her and all she taught me that one day (15+ years from now JOANNE) I will be able to be a mom to my kids. If I can manage to be 1/10th of the mother she was to us I’ll be doing something right.

From Sarah,

You really are the best, It’s hard to put in words how great of a mom you are to us three. As your loving child you should know what an impact you have had on me. I know that I wouldn’t be the type of person I am today with out you having as my mom. Whether I knew it at the time or not, you were always looking out for me. It’s because of you that I am never worried about having kids or being a mom myself, because I have you as MY mom, and you’re just the tops. You are a ridiculous person sometimes Jo Jo, overprotective as they can get, but I love you for it. Stevi and I have given you a pretty hard time  growing up, but whether you can see it or not you are the thing that keeps us two together. Mocking and laughing at your motherly antics is what keeps us together,  without you, our stories wouldn’t be half as interesting. 


From Both of us,

We call you a lot of names; little Josie, Josiah, Jo Jo, Moo  Annie (it will never stick, give up on the dream, you are forever a Joanne) and  Pasta Salad Annie. But the only one that means anything to us is Mom. We could write 1,000 blogs about how lucky we are to call you Mom....we’ll leave the blogging to you but know how loved and appreciated you are by us. Happy Mother’s Day Moooo!!!!!!!!!!!